Skip to main content

Teaching Young Children Intimacy



Teaching intimacy can be scary!! What if we tell them too much? What if they are not ready for what we tell them? What if they don't take it seriously? WHAT IF THEY BECOME TOO CURIOUS? 
These are all questions that parents fear when they think of teaching intimacy to their children. These are some concerns I had. My parents did not talk about intimacy or anything of the like. I wish they had. Luckily I had wonderful older sisters and young women leaders who I could go to if I had a question or concern. When it came time for me and my fiance to marry, I felt awkward going to my Mom because she had never been open with me about intimacy. Wedding dress with sleeves | Mormon temple wedding | Church of ...


Teaching intimacy can be scary!! What if we tell them too much? What if they are not ready for what we tell them? What if they don't take it seriously? WHAT IF THEY BECOME TOO CURIOUS?

I firmly believe that if parents can openly and appropriately speak to their children about intimacy they will be able to better prepare and enjoy intimate relations with their future spouse. Many young women and some young men have the belief that sex is bad. This comes from being undereducated about what intimacy is and how it can bless our marriages and eternal life. This can cause major issues as they marry because they will feel ashamed in partaking in this appropriate relationship with their spouse. 

In studying how we, my husband and I can help our children understand the importance of remaining sexually pure and preparing for their future marriage, we came across an article by Linda and Richard Eyre. The Eyres specializes in providing education for parents and couples. In this article about Talking with your children about sex, the couple shares tidbits are ways to talk about sex with each age group. They encourage parents to start early. With preschool age, children talk about how special and amazing their body is. Teach them to treat it with respect. Then when they are around 8 help them be excited about a special talk the parents with have with them. They recommend trying this talk on their birthday so they understand its significance. Then have talked with them as they grow older. The Eyres refer to these as "booster shot" talks. (Eyre, R)

In our reading on teaching intimacy to children in "Intimacy and purposes of eternal families," it says "Your ultimate goal within your family should be to prepare your sons and daughters to be worthy of the great blessings the Lord has promised them if they are true and faithful."
The link to this chapter is here


I felt this was a vital part that parents should remember. Teaching our children about intimacy should not be a chore. It should feel exciting to help our children on the path to better understand who they are and their eternal purpose in God's plan. I believe that providing our children with a healthy and happy family environment that is centered on Jesus Christ and his teaching will help them better understand why families are important and better desire to stay chaste until they are able to begin an eternal family of their own. 
                                                          
                                                               Resources 
Eyre, R. (n.d.). How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex. Retrieved from https://valuesparenting.com/vp/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-sex/
Intimacy and the Purposes of Earthly Families. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/a-parents-guide/chapter-1?lang=eng

 Photo of Married couple:
Wedding dress with sleeves: Mormon temple wedding: Church of Jesus Christ of... (With images): Modest wedding dresses with sleeves, Modest wedding dresses, Wedding dress sleeves. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/747034656917219960/

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Parenting with love

As I have taken this course I have been impressed by the topics we have learned. One of the biggest takeaways for me is how we can parent with love. Does love mean we never discipline, we are pushovers and we give our children all we want? When we look at what was taught in this course as well as what is provided by prophets, we can learn what it means to parent with love.  In Mosiah 4:14-15, King Benjamin is teaching his people and he says “And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they  transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another. … “But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; … to love one another, and to serve one another.”(Mosiah 4:14-15, Book of Mormon) I think the word discipline can sound harsh and scary, however, I believe it is how we discipline that can be negative or positive to the child. King Benjamin states that we should not tolerate our childr...
Post a Comment
Read more

Authentic motivation

"If you clean your room, ill give you a candy bar". Now this will probably work...once. Sure, if a kid is feeling like a candy bar at that moment, he will go clean his room. However, if you just gave him a candy bar for practicing piano he might rather skip out on the sugar. Now what? If this is your go to bribe how will you help your child know it is time for him to clean his room? You are out of options. Or are you?  Family researchers have spent countless hours studying how children respond to bribes. Dr. Steve Dennis, Dean of Education & Human Development of BYU- Idaho helps us understand this concept in his article " What's the problem with Bribes?"  He says that "The problem (with rewards) comes when parents use rewards or punishments that are neither authentic nor logical. They are arbitrary and have no connection to the situation."(Dennis, Steve) He further explains that as a reward is connected to the situation or rather is it "aut...
Post a Comment
Read more